Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Happy Holidays!

I know it's been a while since I've updated! I'm sorry! The month and half (or so) from Thanksgiving to New Year's is always crazy, but when you add to that four kids one of which has been sick on and off, plus pregnancy with an injury, things start to get really crazy!

Speaking of the shoulder injury, I'm healing quickly and doing very well. I don't need to have surgery any time soon, so that's a blessing. (I will eventually have to have surgery, but it isn't anything too serious and can wait until after I have the baby.) I'm doing much better at typing and can even use a mouse that it's independent of my laptop now.

The baby is doing wonderful! We have an appointment on January 5th for an ultrasound...not just any ultrasound, but THE ultrasound. We'll find what G&K are having.

The little bean has been moving almost non-stop for a couple of weeks now. My youngest enjoys sitting on the couch next to me and putting her hand on my belly waiting for the baby to kick. She hasn't felt anything yet, but soon she will. She can't wait! It's great to see her so excited about it.

That's pretty much where we are right now. I'm going to have to get a good belly shot and post it so you all can see how much I've grown. Once we get the ultrasound, I'll post that too. Well, I'm off...the kids are yelling for their lunch, so I need to get the something before they starve to death!

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Oi Vey!

Thanksgiving has come and gone and the Christmas Holidays are in full swing. I haven't updated this in a while because I injured my shoulder and it was taking forever to type...plus it hurt something fierce.

Before I go any further I want to post a warning for any parents out there who have a mini-van with those automatic sliding doors. You know the ones. They're awesome because you can just hit a button and they open on their own. I know how convenient they are. Heck, that's part of the reason I bought my mini-van! BUT, don't assume they're always going to work correctly. Ours are supposed to stop moving at the first sign of resistance. That way, if something is caught in the doorway, it stops and doesn't crush it. Well, we had told our daughter not to open the door until we said it was ok. She didn't listen, and opened it anyway. I was sitting in the passenger's seat and I reached, with my right hand, over my head and grabbed the handle of the door. (It has handles at the top of the door, by the window.) I pulled on it, attempting to stop it. It didn't stop. It bucked/jumped and continued going backward. This motion caused my arm to become dislocated. I let go and leaned forward (because I thought I was going to be sick) and re-located my arm. (This isn't the first time I've dislocated that arm. The doctor said it's normal for a person to be able to relocate their own arm if they've dislocated it a couple of times before.) In the process (after an MRI, they realized) I also have a hairline fracture in my humerus, and partially torn ligaments. I'm in physical therapy and am healing nicely.

Ok, now onto the good stuff! I had an OB appointment this past week. The baby's heartbeat was in the 150s. I'm measuring right on track. My weight is the same as my appointment 1 month ago. Although the doctor would like to see me gain weight, she says I seem to be doing ok, so she's not really worried about it right now. I have an appointment on January 2nd and at that time, we'll find out the sex of the baby! I'm so excited! I think I know what we're having, but I've been known to be wrong before. (Don't tell my husband I said that!)

I've been feeling the little bean moving around in there. I feel him more when my bladder is full. My bladder seems to be his favorite spot to kick. I guess he's preparing me for the months to come!

Well, that's all I have for now. As soon as I have more to tell, you can bet I'll be on here posting for the couple of people who drop by to check on me. (Thanks ladies! I really appreciate you caring enough to see how I'm doing!)

Monday, November 17, 2008

Knock on Wood...

Ok, so I'm kind of nervous posting this, but I've gone two days without morning sickness.

*knock on wood*

And then today...I managed two 10 minute naps. I was writing my research paper and dozed off on the couch both times. Hey, it's a research paper...maybe that was why I fell asleep and had nothing to do with the pregnancy! I like that idea. Maybe the second trimester is going to be better after all! *knock on wood*

On a different note, I've been sleeping really well lately. I have some really weird and vivid dreams, but I'm sleeping well! I really, really, more than anything, miss riding my motorcycle. I keep hoping that I have a dream about riding, because at least that might satisfy my need to ride. I told my IM I was actually glad I sold my bike because it would be too tempting having it sitting there in the garage. Hubby's bike is sitting out there...but I can't ride his as he is taller then me.

We had our last appointment with the RE on Saturday. I've officially been released to my regular OB! I'm also off of medication now. The nurse said she was impressed that I've only gained 3lbs since the transfer. I've gained a total of 14lbs since I started meds. I figure I'm doing really well. I'm eating fairly healthy...even though I prefer eating out to eating at home. Even when I do eat out though, I'm eating things like salads, or only getting sides (ie mashed potatoes, green beans, applesauce and a salad...that's my order at Texas Roadhouse!)

I keep feeling flutters and swear the little one is beginning to wiggle. When we had our appointment on Saturday my IM said the baby didn't stop moving the whole time. He looks great. He's growing right on track and, like I said before, moves all over the place.

We had lunch with my IPs on Saturday. The four of us and our combined 6 kids. (My four, their two.) It was great. I got to learn even more about my IM. She enjoys playing Guitar Hero. I was shocked. She doesn't strike me as the type...then again, most people don't think I'm singer, enjoy writing, riding motorcycles and playing an MMORPG. I'm a cool geek.

So that's my update.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Woot! We're in the 2nd tri!

Well, I managed to make into the second trimester! Yeah me!

I went to bed Monday night with expectations of waking refreshed, hungry and ready to tackle the day. Let me say, just because you're in the second trimester, doesn't mean that suddenly all the first trimester stuff goes away. (Wouldn't it be great if that were the case?) I woke up Tuesday morning with a horrible migraine. I was hungry, but I also felt nauseous...that was just because I hadn't eaten in like 8 or so hours.

Other then that, I'm doing pretty good. I've finally found a great, comfortable way to sleep...but it only works when hubby is at work. (He works third shift.) So this afternoon, when he wakes up, we're going to go buy me at least one, maybe two new pillows so I can sleep better, even when he's home.

My IPs are great. G has been so worried that I'm going to need something and not ask her for it. Everytime she writes, she lets me know if there is anything I need, to let her know so she can get it for me. I keep telling her that there's nothing I need, and I'm doing great.

Speaking of the baby and my IPs. I can't wait for the baby to start moving so I can let them know. It'll be one of the first milestones in our pregnancy.

Other than that, not much to report. I've been feeling rather alone. Most of my family (extended: parents, siblings, etc.) have quit talking to me. Hubby says to just keep smiling because I'm content with my decision to be a surrogate, and am thrilled to be helping my IPs, and that's all that matters. I'm doing alright. It's not like we talked much anyway. More then anything, I wish I had an experienced surro to bounce ideas and questions off of...this pregnancy is so different then any of my others, and there are somethings I'm feeling that...well, it's different, and I wondered if it's normal.

Well, if you're actually reading this, thank you. It's nice to know that someone actually does care. If you didn't make it this far...I'm sorry to have bored you so much.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Long Overdue Update

I really need to start updating this thing regularly. I had been doing really well, then I got pregnant and, well...I forgot just how exhausting it is to be pregnant!

So I had another ultrasound. That's it over there. G & K swear it's a boy...and since I was wrong about the twins, and I keep calling it a girl...chances are they're right! Who knows though? We'll see in a few more weeks. I'm 10 weeks along today (so I guess it'll be more like 10 more weeks or so before we know what they're having!)

I tell you, I absolutely love seeing the look on G & K's faces when they see the baby on the little ultrasound screen. The sheer joy on G's face is wonderful!
Well, the sheer exhaustion I've been feeling seems to be lifting. Yesterday I was able to get laundry started, and unload, then reload and start the dishwasher. I also got the kids off to school during that time. Of course then I had to rest on the couch...but I didn't fall asleep! I know it sounds silly, but it's a huge accomplishment for me.

My kids haven't been feeling well. There has been a horrible flu bug going around, and they've all gotten it. Because of that, I've been up at nights. I'm still trying to recover from the lost sleep, but I seem to be moving in the right direction.

And lastly, on a sadder note, I was very hurt by someone I considered a close friend when they compared me being a surrogate to being a paid employee, and then, just seconds later to a whore. I knew surrogacy wasn't going to go over well with everyone in my life. My own mother seems to want to take the out of sight, out of mind approach. Never once though has she degraded me, or what I am doing. This "friend" managed, in less then 30 seconds, to say I had a job (to carry their baby) and then comment on how I was getting paid too much considering I wasn't on my back long enough. I have never discussed my compensation with anyone. No one knows how much or how little I am getting paid, or if I'm getting paid at all.

Sadly, that friend just called me (actually his wife called) she's at 7cm and is about ready to deliver and they need my help with some things. It hurts that I couldn't even get an apology from them before they demand things of me.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

How many calories a day extra?

Things are going well with the baby and I. I've been trying to get as much rest as possible, but I feel like I'm constantly exhausted! I wake up every morning and get the kids off to school, only to come home and fall back asleep on the couch.

Today, in addition to the exhaustion, I've added a somewhat new symptom. The way I eat. I got up this morning, got the kids ready for school and ate a bowl of cereal. I took them to school, came home, and ate a banana. I fell asleep on the couch watching Rachael Ray, only to be woke up by a bunch of screaming middle age women. (Did you know that New Kids on the Block had made a comeback?) And then I had half a cucumber. I talked with hubby, did some dishes, then ate the other half of the cucumber.

I'm getting ready to leave for school before too long, and I'll take a cut up orange with me, as well as a belly bar and a protein shake.

The point is, I'm not eating a whole lot at any one time, but a little bit through out the day. On the other hand, I haven't been having many issues with the nausea anymore, so maybe this is a good thing. I'm going to have to do some research though to find out how many extra calories a day I'm supposed to take in when pregnant.

Monday, October 6, 2008

The Ultrasound!

Well, it's been a long couple of days, and I've been so tired. I woke up this morning, got the kids off to school, came home to study some and ended up falling back asleep until 1030. I barely remember my husband coming home from work this morning at 9am.

So I had the official ultrasound on Friday. Despite what I thought, and what others had said, there is only one little bean in there. He has a strong heartbeat of 140bpm. The ultrasound technician pointed out where the brain was forming and you could see the heartbeat. She said I'm measuring a little ahead of where I thought I was. I am officially 7w5d today.

I would post a picture of the ultrasound, but my scanner isn't working right. I'll have one up within the next couple of days though. When I do, you will be able to see the cavity where the brain is forming, indicating his head, and the area where his heart is.

The look on G&K's faces when they heard the heartbeat, and saw the baby...that was priceless. K grinned a grin I had never seen before. It lit up his entire face. G, she became so...she was nearly speechless. Her jaw fell loose, and she stared at the little monitor in awe. She told me that she was proud of me...although I don't know what I did that was so special. I managed to get pregnant. I guess though, in this type of situation, that is something special and not to be taken lightly.

I have another ultrasound on October 17th and when that one is done I believe the RE will be releasing me to my regular OB. That means no more 3+ hour drives to get a check up.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The PEO is back, and it brought with it Morning Sickness!

Well, things have gotten crazy over the past couple of weeks. The NC (nurse coordinator) called last week and said that she realized that the labs had done the wrong blood work. When she emailed me the new orders, I looked at them, and realized that she had ordered the wrong labwork...not that the lab had messed up.

So I went and had the blood drawn. The NC calls the next day and tells me that every looks great, the beta number is really high, then proceeds to tell me that they're switching me from the suppositories back to the PEO shots. I wanted to get sick, partly because the PEO shots were so bad for me, partly because morning sickness was getting to me. She told me that my progestrone levels were low, which is normal for the suppositories, but she wants to see them higher, so I'm back to the shots. I've taken 5 of them, and already I'm having issues walking, sleeping, and the heating pad is permanently glued to my bum. I have huge knots and it's painful! I keep reminding myself this is for the babies, this is for the babies, and I'm sure I'll get through it.

On top of that, I have morning sickness that lasts all day. I've lost three pounds in the past two days (or so) because I can't keep anything down. I have managed to keep toast down more often then not, and last night I was so hungry that I ate an Italian sub sandwich from Domino's Pizza. (I didn't keep it down but I ate it!) I called the NC today and asked for something to help quell the nausea, so hopefully I'll get some relief soon.

Friday October 3rd is the ultrasound! I'm so excited! Everyone I've talked to (all my friends) swear I'm having at least twins. I can't talk about the pregnancy without using the word "babies"...it's never baby. Add to that the fact that everyone swears I'm already 3 or so months pregnant, yeah...there are more likely then not multiple babies in there. (But hopefully no more then two!)

Thursday, September 18, 2008

It's been a while

Hello everyone! I apologize for taking so long to write. Things got really crazy this weekend, and I absolutely had to deal with that first.

So as many of know, I had blood work drawn on Friday to determine whether or not I was pregnant. (Apparently 5 HPTs isn't proof enough! :) ) Then Ike hit early Saturday morning, and my doctor's office was in it's path, so I lost contact with them. I tried all day Monday to get in touch with someone at their office, but to no avail. I got a hold of my regular OB and explained the situation, and the fact that I was going to run out of medication the next morning. If I didn't have those meds, I would most certainly miscarry. She told me that she couldn't give me the meds, but they would see if the RE in that office would help me. They were willing to see me if it was an emergency...and they deemed this an emergency. I was asked to come in Monday afternoon and they would give me the PEO shot, and some Estrace, and also do the next Beta test.

Well, that's when my RE decided to return my IM's phone calls...and he yelled at her! He told her that I knew I was supposed to stay on the medications and he didn't know why I was wasting their time. She told him I was out of medication, and boy was she upset!

So they got me more meds first thing the next morning, shipped directly to my house. That morning, Tuesday, I went and had a second beta test. Your beta is supposed to be drawn, then two days later drawn again, and then two days after the second, drawn again. Well, I had mine drawn on Friday...then decided of my own free will to have it drawn on Tuesday. I still don't haev the results from either test. Tuesday afternoon, after the second blood draw, I get a call from the doctor's office. No one has a clue what I'm talking about when I tell them I had blood work done. They didn't know I needed it. I explain what I'm talking about, and they tell me they'll find it. In the mean time, they're changing my medications around. Instead of giving myself a shot every night (WOOHOO NO MORE SHOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) they're going to have my insert a pill into my va-jay-jay three times a day (not as bad as shots, but way messier!)

So that's where things stand right now. My calendar says I'm supposed to have an ultrasound two weeks from today (as I am 5 weeks exactly today) but I haven't been called to schedule that, and I have no idea what's going on there.

Oh! And I got the most wonderful package in the mail today! I got a tin of Mrs. Fields cookies! They look so delicious! There are sugar cookies in the shape of flowers, with smiley faces in the center. There are chocolate chip cookies. And double chocolate chip! My IM included such a beautiful little note that made me cry (happy tears!) I'm so lucky to have found such great people! I can't wait to see the look on their faces at the first ultrasound!

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Because you had a bad day...

So I woke up this morning and my buttocks/hip area was so knotting up that it was causing my lower back to spasm. I called my family physician and explained to the nurse that I am pregnant and what's going on and she told me that because I'm pregnant, they can't give me anything for the muscle spasms. She told me to continue taking Tylenol. I've been sitting on the heating pad all day, and that has helped tons! I wonder if, perhaps, I'm not sitting on the heating pad long enough after giving myself the shots. So tonight, after I give myself the PIO shot, I will sit on the heating pad for longer then I have been.

I had blood drawn yesterday and was supposed to get the results no later then 6pm yesterday. However, because of Hurricane Ike, chances are I won't get my results until, at the earliest, Monday. I just hope that everyone there is ok, and stayed safe.

Well I'm tired, and am going to go lay down for a little rest.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

What's the deal with the PIO?

WARNING: The following blog contains candid shots of a person giving themselves a shot. If needles make you queasy, wait until tomorrow's blog...there won't be any needles. ;)


I had someone email me through my blog here. This person asked me what the shots were like. I want the people who read my blog and are considering becoming a surrogate to have all the information they possibly can...that is part of the reason I created this blog. With these people in mind, I about to show you what a PIO shot is all about.

There are two kinds of shots you take as a surrogate. The first is Lupron. You would use an insulin needle, similar to the one pictured on the left.

This medication is a subcutaneous injection (meaning it goes just under the skin) and it shuts down the body's normal hormone production, thus pushing the surrogate into menopause (basically). This allows the doctor to further control the surrogate's cycle and begin to ensure the surro's uterus is ready for the transfer right when the doctor needs her to be ready.

Side effects include, but are not limited to, hot flashes, night sweats, headaches, weight gain and at least with me...acne.

The next shot is the PIO, or Progesterone In Oil. Or in my case PEO, as I have Progesterone in Ethyl Oleate. The Progesterone can come in all types of oil from Extra Virgin Olive Oil to Sesame Oil. You use the needle to the right.

This medication is an inter-muscular injection (just like it sounds, the needle goes into the muscle). You use the needle to the right to draw up the medication, then you switch to another needle with just a bit thinner. (It is, however, just as long.)

Then comes the fun part. Once you've drawn up the medication, you need to ice the area where you will be giving yourself the injection. Although there are many areas to give yourself the shot, the best area is the hip/bum.
^Yep, that's me giving myself the shot in the upper outer part of my butt cheek. When you give yourself the shot, with no help from others, you get to twist yourself into a pretzel, inject the needle at the proper angle, and then begin to push the medication in. Because it is in an oil, the medication is very thick, and takes a little bit to get it all in. One trick I have learned: While you are icing your bum, your heating pad should be warming up for you to sit on when you're done. After you draw up your medication, put the syringe under the heating pad. This will warm the medication, making it easier to inject.
Once you've given yourself the shot, rub the area. This will help massage the oil into the muscle. After a minute or so, sit on a heating pad. Again, this helps the muscle, and the oil, loosen up, allowing the muscle to absorb the meds easier.
That's pretty much it. Well, except for the knots in the muscle from continuous injections, then the pain when sitting, walking...moving...but other then that, it's not that bad. You just keep reminding yourself why you're doing this. Every time I do this, I think of G & K holding their brand new baby. I think of the smile on their faces when they get to see their child for the first time. And I think of G's voice when she called me this morning to tell me she got the pictures of the positives I sent.
Then, well, then it's all worth it.

++++++++++ HPT +++++++++++

The title says it all!
I POAS yesterday morning and got a positive. I was kind of nervous as it was really light, and decided to do with G & K what I would do with hubby...wait for the second test to be sure.

This morning rolled around (all too early if you ask me) and I POAS again...and sure as the sun rises in the morning, there it was! I'm pregnant and G & K are going to be parents!! I'm so excited for them!

Beyond POAS, not much is happening. I've been having bouts of morning sickness. I'm doing alright though. This morning, one of the dogs got sick, and that didn't help my morning sickness, but I survived it.
I pulled out the prenatal yoga DVDs and am doing those. I've gone back to really watching what I eat. I bought a bunch of belly bars last night and have those for snacks. I've been making protein shakes for quite a while now, and have added some extra fruits to those so they're even healthier and give the babies what they need. I've been taking a prenatal viatamin as well as the Estrace.
Oh...and the shots continue. :( My poor bum is a pin cushion. Every night I prepare to do the injection and I just keep reminding myself "It's almost over. It's almost over." Actually, last night's mantra was "This is for the babies. This is for the babies."
I think I changed the mantra because I finally know that there is at least one little embryo that stuck around...and so long as I hold on to that one little baby, I can get through how many ever weeks of shots I have to take.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Knots and Negatives

Sometimes life gives you lemons...this is usually when I break out the tequila and salt and call it a party. Right now, I have tons of lemons, but can't drink.

I'm still giving myself the PIO shots. Every night around 9pm CST, I'm pulling out a large needle, icing down my bum, and preparing to intentionally do something that I know will hurt. I will then push that needle into my hip/bum and straight into the muscle underneath it. Having done this so many times has left a huge knot on both of my butt cheeks...right where it meets my back. These knots have become so painful that it hurts to stand, or sit. Once I get comfortable with one position, I naturally move, and it hurts again. Such is the life of a surrogate. We intentionally inflict pain upon ourselves in order to make another happy.

Which bring me to the negatives. Negative pregnancy tests that is.

I was so sure I'd have a BFP by now. Everyone keeps saying that hope is still there...chances are I won't get one until later, like 9dp3dt...it doesn't make it any easier. And my IM decided she did want to know when I got a BFP, and I don't have the heart to tell her I haven't gotten one yet. I can't hurt her like that. I can't even imagine the pain she's gone through and the last thing I want to do, is to cause her more pain.

So that's where things stand now. I'm having all sorts of odd symptoms, like food cravings, my breasts ache horribly, I'm tired and cranky all the time...and even when I do sleep, I get up at least twice in the night to pee.

Once I have new information I'll post. Till then, nothing new to report.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

2 hours and counting...

We're in the home stretch...only two hours left on bed rest. At first it was nice, being able to sleep when I was tired, not having to deal with the children and their arguements...but as the first full day started, I began to realize I couldn't take much more "reality" TV, I missed doing my daily yoga and Tai Chi...and I was quickly running out of books to read. I also realized that my stomach was beginning to swell, and the fact that I was eating non-stop wasn't helping! C'est la vie! Such is the way of a surrogate!

I slowly got dressed this morning, trying to find clothes that would fit me comfortably, but I couldn't manage to find any pants as my abdomine has swollen quite a bit since transfer. So I called a girlfriend today who is currently 28 weeks pregnant and asked her if she had any maternity pants from early on that she would mind me borrowing. Luckily she did. So I have those on, and a tank top that I bought before. I figure I'm going to end up having to buy some clothes a bit sooner then anticipated if I keep growing at the rate I am now.

Well, I've managed to kill about 20 minutes just typing this up. I'm going to upload some pictures from the transfer and that should take another 20-30 minutes. Then I'll be within an hour of being able to get up. I may be able to make it to class if I can convince hubby to spring 30 minutes early! (That's not happening, lol)

Monday, September 1, 2008

Transfer, Bed Rest, and Cravings...Oh My!

So we transferred yesterday, Sunday August 31. The IF, K, chose three beautiful embryos. I thought they were all beautiful, but he chose one perfect embryo, and two not quite perfect embryos. The doctor said if we get pregnant there is a 75% chance it's a singleton, 25% of twins, and a 1% of triplets. We transferred the three embryos and then I had to lay there, prone, for 30 minutes. Under normal circumstances, this wouldn't be that big of a deal, but because I had to have a full bladder for the transfer...it was horrid!
After 30 minutes, I got up, emptied my bladder and changed back into my clothes. My husband drove me home and I slept most of the way. Part of the way home, I woke up and asked my husband why he was driving the way he was. His response: "I am responsible not only for you, but for G and K's three children you're carrying. I have to be extra careful." I almost cried. He's so wonderful. Even as I type this, he has run out to the store to buy cheese for soft pretzels.

So here I am, just finishing my first full day of bed rest. I woke up this morning and was famished! I ate breakfast, and within 30 minutes was dry heaving in the bathroom. It was exactly like when I was pregnant with my daughters. I'm trying not to think anything of it, and thinking it's just a coincidence, but it seems odd to me...

And then there are the cravings! I've been craving pickles since before the transfer. I think that's the medicine I'm on, so I'm not reading anything into that. I have, however, started craving hot dogs and ice cream. That's definitely out of the norm for me. *shrugs*

I have the official pregnancy test in two weeks. I will be POAS sooner then that though. Unfortunately, since my IPs don't want to know, and want to wait until the official BETA from the doctor, I will not be sharing the results with anyone until then.

Well, hubby just got home with the cheese for my pretzels, so I must be off. I will be updating again soon.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Doah...aka How I shot myself twice

Every Friday night my family and I get together with several other families and play games. Usually us adults play poker or DnD (Dungeons and Dragons) and the kids play Guitar Hero, Rock Band, or just run around like rabid monkeys.

Last night was no different. This time, instead of staying at our house (like we do on Payday Friday's) we went over to a friends house and played DnD (good thing too because I was getting tired of losing money!) I loaded up all of my meds, including one 18 gauge needle syringe, with the 23 gauge needle to swap out, my alcohol swabs, etc for the PIO shot.

We got there, and were playing, and my alarm went off indicating it was time to give myself the shot. I went into the spare bedroom, iced down my bum and drew up my medication. I drew up 1mL. I cleaned the area and inserted the needle.

It was about this time that it dawned on me...I was supposed to increase my dose this evening from 1mL to 2mL. I have no other needles, and now that the needle I do have is inside of me (in the muscle in my hip) I have two choices. I either remove the needle, pack everyone up in the car and drive the 45 minutes back home to do the injection properly, or I go ahead and give myself the 1mL I already have in my hip and then give myself the other 1mL when we get home. Now, at this point, I have my pants around my ankles and a long needle in my ass (I mean my "hip") and I can hear my kids having fun, and hubby laughing...what is a good wife and mother to do?

I gave myself the injection, and then when we got home, well after midnight, I injected myself a second time with the second 1mL.

I learned my lesson! The first shot didn't hurt at all...the second shot hurt like a son-of-...Well, you get the idea. I guess the old adage is right: Measure twice, cut once. Next time I go to give myself an injection, I will double check the amount in the syringe before I even bring the needle near my bum!

Friday, August 29, 2008

Just a little update...

Well, things are moving right along here. The egg retrieval was moved from Wednesday to Thursday, but it went off yesterday without a hitch. I'm waiting for the nurse coordinator to call or email me and let me know how things are going.

Because the egg retrieval was yesterday, that moved my calendar around a little bit. I stopped the Lupron shots, and started the PIO shots. I gave myself the first shot last night. It went really well! I have a little pain today, but that is to be expected. I haev two more weeks of shots in the bum, then, whether we have a positive pregnancy test or not, I stop. If I am indeed pregnant, then I just have to "take" vaginal suppositories for several weeks to help my body sustain the pregnancy.

I'm cautiously optimistic about this transfer. Last time we did this, I was so excited and thrilled...then we got to the transfer and found out none of the embies survived. I cried the whole rest of the day. This time, I'm going to sit back and relax and enjoy the ride. I'm happy and can't wait, but at the same time, I'm almost reserved and cut off from it. I'm sure when I get to the Dr's office on Sunday for the transfer, I'm going to be really excited.

So that's where things are now. I have to go out today and get a shirt to wear to the transfer. I'm going to wear green and yellow, luck and fertility. I'll update when there's more to know!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Meds, Meds, and Oh, Look! More Meds!

So here I am, less then two weeks away from transfer and I'm so excited! But I have hit a minor bump in the road.

I woke up this past weekend and realized that my ear was draining profusely. I've had issues with my ears since I was very young, but usually I have an ear ache before my ear drum ruptures. Not this time. My ear drum ruptured, and there was very little pain. I went to my PCP (primary care physician) and they prescribed me an antibiotic and a steriod. The antibiotic I take once a day. The steriod is amazingly difficult to keep up with. It's one of those that hits you hard the first day with 6 pills, then gradually reduces the pills till day 6 when you only take one.

So everyday I take an antibiotic in the morning plus a steriod and an Estrace (estrogen for the surrogacy). Then after lunch, I take more steriods. Then around 3pm, I take more Estrace. After dinner I take more steriods. Between 6 and 7pm I then have to give myself a Lupron shot. Then at bedtime I have to take more steriods, and if I'm hurting to badly I have been given some heavier pain meds to help me sleep. Tylenol has been working though, so I've only taken that once.

Thankfully (woohoo, there's a silver lining!) the RE (the reproductive endocrinologist...aka the surrogacy doctor) and the nurses said that this won't effect our chances of a successful pregnancy and it won't mess up the cycle at all. That is a huge relief to me! I was so worried that my IPs chance at a child would be messed up because of my stupid ear! But the doctor said it won't, and that makes me feel so much better! (Not to mention I'm already feeling so much better because of the meds.)

That's where things stand for now. On Saturday my meds change, just to add another Estrace to the mix. I'll then be taking one at 8am, one at 3pm, and one at 8pm, plus the shot between 6-7pm. I have a doctor's appointment for bloodwork and an ultrasound lining check on Sunday, yes, my RE has Sunday hours. Then Sunday night, I start taking a fourth Estrace...sorta. This is a vaginal suppository. (I'll spare you the details, lol)

Monday, August 11, 2008


Well, every so often you're going to see me blog about something that might be considered a bit more personal then other things. This is one of those moments.

I started Lupron a little less then a week ago. I took my last BCP less then a week ago and now I'm on my period. Although AF is a bit light this month, because of the meds, I'm still crampy, and cranky. I'm so hormonal. I was watching the opening ceremony of the Olympics and started bawling like a baby when I saw Yao Ming pick up the little boy who saved some of his friends from the rubble after the earthquake in China. Ok, so that was a sappy moment...but seeing the lighting of the torch wasn't, and I cried at that too!

Oh well, such is the life of a woman on IVF meds!

Hopefully I'll make it through today without crying! Other then the crying, and mild headaches, I haven't had any other side effects. That kind of worries me. Last time I had hot flashes, and weird dreams. I was always hungry, and tired, emotional and had headaches...and I put on a lot of weight! This time around I'm still super emotional with mild headaches, but I'm not having hot flashes...In fact, I've been really cold. I have been a bit more tired, but nothing like last time. I'm hoping that my body is responding as it's supposed to. I'm so worried that my body is reacting the way it did last time, and that's why I'm not having the same side effects. I'm also worried that I'm going to screw up the cycle because of this. I keep telling myself not to worry, but it's hard sometimes!

I have blood work done in about a week, so that will tell how things are going. Until then, I will continue eating pineapples, and drinking my soy milk. (These are things I do anyway, but are supposed to help build a woman's lining and aid in the process.)

If anything else happens in the meantime, I'll keep ya'll informed. Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

I'm loopy with Lupron!

Well, I drove all the way to Houston yesterday in the middle of a "hurricane" (with my four kids and hubby) for my baseline appointment. Once that was done, I came all the way home and last night gave myself my first Lupron shot!

I've done all this before, but it seems so weird to be doing it again! It took me a few moments to work up the nerve to put that needle in my stomach...and once I did, I almost laughed because I didn't even feel it! I guess the first time for anything is the most difficult and it only gets better from there.

So here I am, day two of my calendar. I stop taking the BCP today. I'm on Lupron alone until the 15th. Then I add an estrogen pill. I'm in a kind of reserved state of excitement right now. With our last cycle I was so thrilled and excited...and then it never happened. Our last three embryos never survived the thaw and the transfer was cancelled. I think I'm just trying not to get my hopes to high, for fear I'm going to end up in the same boat I am in now. (But on the same hand I'm thrilled to be started!!)

Well, that's all for now. I'm sure once I start having side effects from the Lupron I'll write about it. I'm going to need friends to commiserate with!

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Nothing new really

There's not a whole lot going on right now. I'm on BCPs and I have an appointment in just over a week to get my meds. August 5th is the big day. I have my baseline appointment and start meds.

I had a dream last night about giving myself the shots. The Lupron shots don't bother me. Those are with a small insulin needle in the abdomen. It's the PIO shots the get to me. It's a long, thick needle that I have to insert into the muscle in my hip. Last time I got five shots in and then the transfer was cancelled.

At least I get the PIO in the good oil! My progestrone comes in ethyl Oleate oil, which is the thinnest oil there is. Some girls I've talked to have theirs in olive oil, or seasame oil, which is much thicker.

Well, that's all I have for now. Once I learn more, I'll update.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

We're on our way!

So I think I told you all about my cancelled transfer in February because the three embryos didn't survive the thaw. Well, my IPs decided to try again, and this time we're doing a fresh transfer because there are no frozen embryos.

I had an appointment on Saturday. They did a hysteo-sonogram. That's where they fill your uterus full of saline, the insert a sonogram wand and make sure there is nothing wrong with your uterus. Well, my uterus looked perfect. The doctor drew some blood and sent me on my way.

So the ED is on meds and ready for an August 27th retrieval. I'm BCPs and start meds on August 5th. I'll be on Lupron first. Lupron supresses your cycle and basically causes menopause to happen. Last time I did a cycle, I gained weight, and had hot flashes...but I responded perfectly to the meds. I'll probably put on some weight this time, but it's all good.

I'm so excited! My IPs are such wonderful people and I'm so happy to be helping them! They totally deserve to have the family they want, and I'm so proud to be able to help them achieve it.

Well, I'm off for now. I'll post regularly to let everyone know what's going on with me.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

To catch you up to today...

Well, I wanted to start this blog by giving you a little background about me.

I am a happily married mother of four. My husband and I decided we were done having children of our own and, after much soul searching and prayer, we decided (yes, it was a mutual decision) that I would be a surrogate. I had wanted for many years (8 to be exact) to be a gestational surrogate (GS). I decided to wait, because I wasn't done having my own family, and wanted to be sure I didn't want anymore children before helping someone else have a family.

I was approached by a wonderful agency, and am still friends with the coordinator there, but decided to match independantly (indy). My intended parents (IPs) are a wonderful couple and will be referred to here as G & K. G & K are a wonderful heterosexual couple that, for reasons I choose not to explain here, need my help. We were scheduled for a frozen embryo transfer the end of February of 2008. The embryos did not survive the thaw, and after much deliberation, G & K decided to try again. This time we are doing a fresh transfer using the same donor eggs from the frozen batch. So now you're pretty well up to date. I'll update this blog regularly.

Thanks for reading!


While reading this blog, there may be some abbreviations that you commonly see on the internet, like LOL, or LMAO. And there are going to be the ones that aren't so common, like AF, or 2DP5DT. So I'm going to give you a list of abbreviations for you to refer to whenever there's something you're not sure about.

2WW = 2-Week Wait
AF = Aunt Flo -Your menstrual period
AZH = Assisted Hatching
BBT = Basal Body Temperature
BCP = Birth Control Pills
CB = Cycle Buddy
CD = Cycle day - The first day of your period is cycle day 1
DE= Donor Egg
DP3DT = Days Post 3-Day Transfer
DP3DT = Days Post 5-Day Transfer
DPT = Days Post Transfer
E2 = Estradiol
ED= Egg donor/donation
EDD = Estimated Due Date
FET = Frozen Embryo Transfer
GC = Gesational Carrier
GIFT = Gamete Intra-fallopian Transfer
GS-Gestational Surrogate
GTT = Glucose Tolerance Test
hCG, HCG = Human Chorionic Gonadotropin (aka the pregnancy hormone)
HPT = Home Pregnancy Test
IF = Intended Father
IM = Intended Mother
IP = Intended Parent/Parents
IVF = In Vitro Fertilization
LMP = Last Menstrual Period (start date)
M/C = Miscarriage
O = Ovulation
OB = Obstetrician
OB/GYN = Obstetrician/Gynecologist
OTC = Over The Counter
PCOS = Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome
PG = Pregnant
PIO = Progesterone in Oil
PMS = Pre-menstrual Syndrome
RE = Reproductive Endocrinologist
Rx = Prescription
ER = Retrieval (Egg)
SA = Sperm/Semen Analysis
SM = Surrogate Mother
TS= Traditional Surrogate
TTC = Trying To Conceive